


how i met your queen

by shymoon



Series: all i need is six [2]
Category: Six - Marlow/Moss
Genre: 5+1 Things, Gen, Mentions of Grooming, but i don't plan on actually naming him or making him appear, but you decide whether they're actually a thing or not, henry's alluded to, it's the story of how they met!, named after how i met your mother, tags will be updated as i update the fic, vague Aramour
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2020-08-07
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:48:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,017
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25224895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shymoon/pseuds/shymoon
Summary: The five times Catalina got a new housemate & the one time her household started to feel like family.OrThe story of how each Queen met one another & moved into the same house.
Relationships: Anne Boleyn & Catherine of Aragon, Anne Boleyn & Katherine Howard, Catherine of Aragon & Jane Seymour, Katherine Howard & Jane Seymour
Series: all i need is six [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1827490
Comments: 34
Kudos: 95





	1. jane seymour

**Author's Note:**

> this happens in the same au as my parrward fic, but you don't need to read it to understand what happens since this is the prequel.
> 
> age order:  
> • catalina "lina" de aragón  
> • jane "janey" seymour (1 year younger than lina)  
> • anne "annie" boleyn (4 years younger than lina)  
> • anna von kleve (4 years younger than lina)  
> • catherine "cathy" parr (6 years younger than lina)  
> • katherine "kat/kitten/kitkat/kit/kitty" howard (8 years younger than lina)

Rainy Sundays became the standard for Catalina’s vacations. She would much rather stay in sunny Madrid, but her grandparents had left Spain a few years ago and bought a house in England because they were ‘tired of Spain’. How? Catalina would never understand because that was home for her.

Every few months, she and her parents would fly over to her grandparents’ London home. Having all travel expenses paid by the older De Aragón’s, her parents never hesitated to visit. But their work schedules never allowed them to stay longer than a weekend. Even spring fell into summer, they were as busy as ever. So, Catalina and her older siblings would spend a whole month without her parents in England, and instead be taken care of by her grandparents.

As much as Catalina preferred the Spanish weather, she didn’t mind England that much. She got to spend more time with her grandparents, and her oldest sister. Back home, Isabella was rarely home since she was already 15 when Catalina was born. Being the baby of the family meant that she was babied by everyone, but especially by Isabella whenever their parents weren’t around.

Being the youngest of the family had its downfalls too, one of which was fighting for attention with her other siblings. Maria, being the second youngest, and Catalina argued the most. They were 3 years apart, but Maria had wished they had an even bigger age gap just so she could’ve stayed the baby for a while longer. John and Joanna were also kids when they welcomed a new sister in their lives, but by the time Catalina came around, they had already lived a few years as (forgotten) middle children. So, they fought more between themselves than with Catalina.

Maria was the one she fought with the most. Even if they argued less when they were away from home, it wasn’t like they could simply turn off the desire to scream at their sister when the other girl took their toy.

Neither liked arguing, but Catalina did meet her best friend because she was fighting with her sister.

They were at the park and Catalina was upset because she and Maria were supposed to take turns being pushed on the swings by Isabella, but when it was the youngest girl’s turn, Isabella was tired so she took a break. Catalina claimed that Maria took too long, and it was unfair because she had more turns than Catalina did. Maria disagreed, and they bickered until Catalina broke into tears and Maria decided she would just leave her 6 year-old sister alone.

Catalina was tempted to pull back Maria because as much as she argued with her, she was still her sister and wanted to be held by someone she loved. Unbeknownst to her, soon, she would have someone new in her life that she would love.

That someone was a small blonde girl who saw her crying on the side of the sandbox. She gently poked Catalina’s arm and held out a castle-shaped bucket. “Wanna play?” She asked in the softest voice Catalina had ever heard.

She learned that this girl, Jane, lived a few streets away from Catalina’s grandparents’ house. The first time she went over there, she was a bit overwhelmed by Jane’s 4 older brothers running around, but Margery and Jane did their best to make Catalina feel welcomed. Shortly after, they would have regular play dates whenever Catalina was in town. And whenever she had to leave, she always looked forward to go back to see her special English friend.

She cared about her friends in Spain too, but no one was like Jane Seymour. Their bond could not be compared to that of any of Catalina’s other friendships. It was a big reason for Catalina asking her parents to attend the same boarding school as Jane. Her family was old money, so fees weren’t an issue. Her parents were mostly concerned about whether or not she would feel comfortable there without her family, but she insisted that with Jane, she would always feel at home.

It remained true even as Catalina graduated and headed to college. Jane was a year younger than Catalina, but once Jane was enrolled in college, the pair moved into a flat together. Of course, they had friends outside of their little bubble. They met various people in school, some less pleasant than others, but they remained each other’s rocks.

That isn’t to say they never argued. They did. And one argument nearly cost them their friendship. They almost let a guy come between them. Key word: almost.

It started with Catalina’s first break up. Even though she said that she wasn’t as heartbroken about losing the guy as much as having spent the last 3 years of her life being with him, there was a point in time where she loved him. He wasn’t the best boyfriend, far from it actually, but he wasn’t the absolute worst. Towards the end of their relationship, it became apparent though that he wasn’t going to mature fast enough for Catalina. So, they broke things off, and Jane comforted Catalina.

She told her all the things best friends always say, and truly meant it. “You’re better off without him. You deserve a better person than him. He wasn’t worth it.” But it was hard for Catalina to believe those words when a little over a year later, she found out that Jane had started dating that same guy.

Catalina was furious that Jane would even consider dating him after hearing all about how terrible of a person he had become. They had just moved into their flat together when Jane revealed that she bumped into _him_ a few weeks ago and asked her out, not remembering that he had dated her best friend.

“You told him no, right?” Catalina asked.

At first, she did, but they kept bumping into each other because he studied at a school nearby. Studying to become a nurse meant that Jane often came back home late because she spent time after class to study at school. And he would leave school late after a long study session because he was planning to pursue a post-grad education at a prestigious school. So, he offered to walk home together.

Jane understood after a while why Catalina found him charming (at some point). He had a fire in him that made her want to listen to what he had to say. When he asked her out again a few months later, Jane found herself saying yes.

She felt guilty because she and Catalina never exactly established that exes were off limit, but she knew how hurt her best friend was after the break up. Yet, she didn’t have it in her to say no to him. He offered to just keep their budding romance on the down-low, and keep it hidden from Catalina after learning about Jane’s dilemma. But she couldn’t do it. Jane could never lie to her best friend about something so important. The least she could do was outright tell Catalina.

So, she did, and that lead to a screaming match between the two.

“You’re such a… a… a traitor! I thought you were my friend! My best friend! How could you do this to me?”

“I am your best friend! I know that he hurt you, and if I could, I would push my feelings for him away, but that’s not how things work!”

“Feelings for him? What? Do you love him?” Catalina scoffed, which Jane took offense to.

“Maybe? Is that so hard to believe? Do you think I’m not mature enough to know what I feel?”

“That is _not_ what I said, Jane.”

“Then what is it that you’re trying to say?” Jane yelled in frustration.

“You barely know the guy! How can you know that you love him?”

“I knew from the moment I met you that I loved you,” Jane countered.

“That is not the same. You know that.”

“How is it different?”

Catalina opened her mouth to respond, but she couldn’t say anything. The obvious answer was that they were friends, and their love for one another could not be compared to how Jane felt about him. That was where things started to get complicated.

For Catalina, her temporary infatuation with him could never even compare to the unconditional love and respect she had for Jane. She believed it was because Jane was just a more special person, someone who she had pretty much grown up with. They had more history. As friends only. Then, here came Jane, implying that how she felt about him was comparable to how she felt about Catalina.

The subtle glances they often threw at each other across the room, blushing whenever the other one caught them. The soft grazing of their hands whenever they sat across from each other at lunch. The long nights they spent awake to talk about hypothetical futures they would share. The countless times they would wake up entangled in the other girls’ limbs after having fallen asleep while watching a movie the night before.

For years, Catalina had convinced herself that this was just how best friends worked. The fluttering in her stomach was a result of admiration for her friend. But, everything came crashing down because years of self-deception could never beat Jane’s moment of vulnerability.

Jane seemed to have caught onto her slip because she soon realized what she said. “I… I just feel like I’m always the one supporting you. I was there by your side when you had your first break up, when people picked on you for coming from a wealthy family, when you studied for your A levels.” Jane’s intentions with these words was to deflect from what she previously said, but there was still some truth to it.

“I don’t regret anything at all, and I’m so proud to be able to have you as my best friend, ever single day of my life. But do you feel the same way about me? Because I know you’re busy with college now, but so am I. And you’ve never even asked me about how things are going for me. You don’t even know that I almost failed a test that could’ve set back my whole career as a nurse. But he does. He knows it, but _you’re_ supposed to be my best friend,” Jane said in a gentler tone.

She had hurt Jane. Catalina realized as Jane walked out of their flat. She had hurt the one person she swore she would protect with her whole life. She never imagined losing Jane because the thought alone scared her, but in that moment of loneliness in their silent flat, Catalina’s fear became so tangible. She felt so disappointed with herself for not having noticed how lonely Jane must’ve been feeling, for not having noticed that she had failed as a best friend.

Sure, Jane dating her ex hurt her, but Catalina wasn’t innocent either. And maybe she was misdirecting her anger because deep down, she knew that she wasn’t that upset over the fact that Jane was dating him. She was upset over the fact that she never got to voice her true feelings for Jane, and now she couldn’t tell her anymore. As much as she hated her ex, maybe he and Jane had a chance at something good. How could she deprive her best friend from being happy?

Jane came back from her walk an hour later, and they both apologized. Catalina for being a bad friend, and Jane for making Catalina feel like she’d been betrayed. She assured Jane that she didn’t do anything wrong because she didn’t have a say in who she was dating, and only wished the best for her. If happiness was with him, then she would support her in that decision.

There was something else they still needed to talk about, but neither dared to mention it the elephant in the room. There was tension between them for months afterwards. They tried to go back to normal, and Catalina tried her best to sound sincere when she asked about Jane’s date with him. Though, nothing felt right.

Catalina considered moving out, leaving the flat for Jane and him. They seemed to be getting pretty serious in just a few months, and things weren’t getting better between her and Jane. She still saw her as her best friend, but ever since their fight, there was just this awkwardness between them. In Jane’s defense, she tried her best to act as if everything was fine. Jane was always better at pretending.

The flat was technically just Catalina’s, but she didn’t mind finding another place if it meant Jane would be happier. “Are we moving? I thought you still had the flat for another year?” Jane asked, making Catalina jump. She thought she was home alone that night because Jane was out with him.

“Um… no not really,” Catalina said and closed her laptop. She took a deep breath before facing Jane. She hadn’t planned on telling her about this until she’d found a place, which wasn’t pressing because Jane had to leave soon for her semester abroad anyways. “I’m planning to move. You’ll stay. If you’d like that, that is. I know you’re going to study abroad for a bit, so I thought I’d look for a place to be able to move out then—”

“And when I’d come back, your things would just all be gone?” Jane’s voice took an accusing tone. “You were planning on ghosting me?”

“No! No, I was going to tell you about it when I found a place… when you were gone…”

“Oh, you were going to tell me about it. Right, don’t you think this is something we should discuss together rather you just announcing that you’re abandoning me?” Jane waved her arms around as she ranted.

“I’m not abandoning you,” Catalina rebutted weakly.

“I thought we were in this together, forever. Like we said when we were kids.” Tears were forming in Jane’s eyes, and this was exactly what Catalina was trying to avoid. She hated to see Jane cry, and the fact that she was the one who caused it made it a thousand times worse.

“We are! I just think we need some time apart. Plus, you two are getting serious so you’re bound to mov—"

“You sound like you’re breaking up with me.”

“I—”

“Which would make two in one night.” At those words, Catalina froze.

“Oh querido,” Catalina cooed and immediately walked forward to embrace Jane who had started to cry. “I’m so sorry. What happened?”

“I told him about studying abroad for a semester and apparently, he doesn’t want to do long distance. France isn’t even that far!” Catalina sat the two of them down on the sofa, pushing away her laptop to make space. She continued to just hold Jane and rubbed circles on her back. Jane rested her head in the crook of Catalina’s neck, letting her tears fall down her face. They stayed in that position for a while until Jane was left hiccupping.

“You can say it,” Jane said so quietly, it was nearly a whisper. Catalina pulled away to look at Jane’s face, not understanding where she was going with this at first. “You can tell me ‘I told you so’.”

“I’m not going to say it.” She shook her head. “Because it wasn’t true. He did love you, and he treated you well.” She hated to admit it, but he was a decent boyfriend to Jane. Years down the road, she would go back to thinking the worst of him, but for now, she’d give him the benefit of the doubt.

“You were right about another thing though.” A beat of silence. “It is different. How I feel about you could never be compared to how I felt about him. My relationship with him never even came close to what the two of us have.”

To say that Catalina was stunned would be an understatement. She was sure that Jane must’ve been intoxicated before coming back home, and was talking out of her arse. She’d literally just been dumped by a guy she said she was in love with.

As if reading her mind, Jane added, “I think I loved him. Or I cared about him deeply. But you… when I’m with you, I feel like I could jump off a cliff—No, you make me want to jump off a cliff, because I know for a fact that you’d be down there to catch me.”

“Okay Janey, honestly, you’re confusing me a little here,” Catalina said, which earned her a chuckle from Jane.

“You know how I hate adventures,” Jane explained, “but you make me want to do things I’d never consider with anyone else. Being with you is exhilarating even when we do the most boring things. Yet, I don’t feel scared. I never wonder and fear what might come next because as long as you’re here with me, I know I’ll be safe.”

Catalina didn’t have the words to reply with a coherent sentence. Instead, she resorted to pulling Jane in a tight hug. She was always better at showing her love that way.

“Promise me you’ll always be by my side?” Jane asked, her voice muffled into Catalina’s shirt.

“Forever, querido,” Catalina replied softly.

And they both kept their promise to stick by one another. They didn’t stay in the flat for long though. Just a year later, Catalina’s grandparents had decided to move back to Spain, and left their England home for their youngest granddaughter since she was the only one who lived nearby.

She was hesitant because was she really ready to become a homeowner? She hadn’t even started her career yet. She was still in school to become a teacher, and it all felt a bit overwhelming. Jane, however, thought this was an amazing opportunity.

“Just think about it. You won’t have to deal with the troubles of finding and buying a house. All you need to worry about now is your career.”

“But maintaining a house,” Catalina argued.

“I’ll help you through it. We’ll both navigate through it, together,” Jane assured her.

So, at 23 and 22 years old respectively, Catalina and Jane left their flat and moved into a house together. At first, the rather large house felt a bit empty. Catalina wondered how her grandparents lived here for years, just the two of them. She realized that maybe that was a reason for them moving back home. To be closer to family.

By then, Catalina considered Jane her family and vice versa, but it still felt like something was missing. In just a couple of years, that feeling would disappear altogether.


	2. anne boleyn

When Catalina started studying in England, she went by Catherine because it was easier to pronounce for the English, but Jane refused to call her that. “Your name’s Catalina. It’s not hard. Even if it was, it’s your name. Why would I call you anything other than your name or your nickname?” Jane said one day.

So, the blonde girl was the only person at school who would ever call her by her birth name. Others had called her that way too, but after years of being called ‘Catherine’ by her peers, it never felt right to be called ‘Catalina’ unless it was Jane.

There were also two other people outside of Catalina’s family who still called her by her birth name. One of them was Anne Boleyn.

Born in Kent, Anne soon moved to France with her family because of her father’s job. The Boleyns went back to England to visit family every once in a while, but once the leaves turned orange, it was time for the three Boleyn children to return to France for school. Anne’s academic journey continued in England as she entered secondary school, and her performance was definitely affected by the switch.

Anne wasn’t exactly failing her courses, but the transition from the French system to the English one didn’t help her lack of motivation in school. She tried to get good grades, but being the middle child meant that her parents paid more attention to her older sister and younger brother. So, she often got away with less than decent grades, whatever that meant.

When A levels came around, she couldn’t slack off anymore. Her family belonged to the upper-middle class, but Anne couldn’t bear the idea of wasting her parents’ money were she to flunk her exams. She also hated the idea of disappointing them. Anne didn’t think of herself as someone who sought the approval of others, but she did want to make her parents proud. At 16, she had had her fair share of critiques from her parents. “That boy will do you no good. You could do better in school. We think you could have become friends with better people.”

Though, it wasn’t like she was going to fail her exams. Well, maybe one of them.

Anne didn’t know why she found Spanish so hard. She already learned French when she was younger because she went to boarding school in France before secondary school. French and Spanish shared Latin roots, so many words were similar. Yet, Anne was seriously doubting whether she’d be able to pass her exams in a few months.

That was how she met Catalina. Or Catherine, as her parents first told her.

There weren’t that many Spanish tutors around in England, but her parents managed to find a small tutoring group who did have a native Spanish speaker who worked with them. The moment Anne revealed she was struggling with the new language, her parents contacted Catherine and hired her as Anne’s tutor.

Anne cared about first impressions, so when she arrived nearly 15 minutes late to her first tutoring sessions, she apologized profusely the moment she was facing Catherine. “I’m _so so so_ sorry. I swear I don’t usually arrive late to things. And I would’ve called you to tell you about it, but my phone died. And I’m really not trying to give you excuses because I know how annoying that is—”

“Anne,” Catherine interrupted her. “Let’s just get on with the lesson, yeah?”

She winced at the blank expression she received, but agreed to proceed anyway. As time passed, Anne tried her best to warm up to her tutor, but it was like that girl made it her duty to let Anne know that she didn’t like her.

No, that wasn’t fair. Her tutor didn’t make her feel like they were on bad terms, but Anne was used to people being friendlier with her. Not to sound arrogant, but she knew that she had a certain charm to her. Everyone she had ever met got along with her, and gravitated towards her. She couldn’t say the same about her tutor though. Anne tried making jokes as Catherine went over the ending of verbs in the present tense, but Catherine gave no reaction to her pleasantries. She simply stared at her in silence.

By the end of her first session, Anne hadn’t given up on winning Catherine over, but she decided that she’d continue her quest next time. For now, she’d settle with just not falling on Catherine’s bad side. She was just leaving the library when she realized she left one of her books behind.

Anne quickly ran back inside to the table where she and Catherine sat. Upon her arrival, she overheard Catherine whispering to someone on the phone. For a moment, she wondered if the other person on the line was speaking way too loudly or if Catherine had dialled the volume on her phone all the way up because she could very clearly hear the other person talking.

“Mija, you _will_ come back home for your brother’s party,” said the other person on the line.

“Mamá, can’t I come another time? I have an exam soon and I really can’t—”

“Catalina De Aragón,” the person, that Anne figured was Catherine—or Catalina’s mother said.

Catherine sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. “Fine. Cuídese, madre.”

“Didn’t know people still addressed their mothers as ‘mother’,” Anne said, making her tutor jump.

“Anne!” She whispered-shouted with her hand on her heart.

“Sorry, I thought you saw me walk in. I was looking for my textbook,” she explained and gestured to the cleared table.

“Oh yes, you forgot it here. I was going to call you, but you told me your phone died. So, I figured I’d bring it to you during our next session.” She leaned down to take out the book from her bag, and handed it to her tutee.

“Thanks. I didn’t mean to eavesdrop by the way… The volume on your phone is really loud,” Anne said meekly.

The older girl waved it off. “My mother’s the one who talks loud. I could keep my phone on the lowest volume and you’d probably hear her in America. And you didn’t overhear anything important, so it’s fine really.”

Anne nodded and thanked her tutor one last time. She started to leave before turning back and asked, “I thought your name was Catherine?”

“It…is.”

“Then why did you mom…” Anne didn’t want to finish that sentence. They both knew Anne have overheard her conversation, but saying it felt more intrusive.

“I’ve been going by 'Catherine' ever since I started secondary school in England. People find it easier to pronounce than Catalina.”

Anne frowned. “It’s literally four syllables. How can people mess it up?”

Catalina let out a laugh. “You’d be surprised how many people used to call me by the wrong name. I’ve heard Carina, Catrina, Karen, Carla.”

“Camilla?”

“Ah, haven’t gotten that one yet, but I’ve gotten Carter.”

Anne couldn’t help but laugh at that one. “Carter? People truly are idiots. I’m sorry about that.”

“I’ve gotten used to it.” Catalina shrugged.

“But you shouldn’t have to. It’s your name… I know I called you Catherine earlier, but is it okay with you if I call you by your actual name?”

Catalina smiled. “Of course.”

Anne grinned. “Then, I want a restart. Mostly because I would rather forget the fact that I arrived 15 minutes late to our first tutoring session.” Catalina laughed and nodded. “Hi,” she said and held out her hand, “I’m Anne.”

“I’m Catalina,” she replied, shaking the teenager’s hand.

From then on, Anne felt like she had unintentionally won Catalina over, which she was glad about. Not because she was a suck-up, but because that was how she gained a new friend. A friend she could never imagine a life without.

Catalina was her tutor, yes. But even after Anne finished her A levels with flying colours, they kept in contact. Upon exchanging social media handles, Catalina realized her ex (and Jane’s future) ex dated Anne right after they’d broken up. Anne was so young when they had gotten together, but he was already nearly an adult. She’d never realized how predatory he had been until she opened up to Catalina about their relationship.

Catalina was the one who suggested she go to a therapist to process this because even though she wanted to help Anne as a friend, she wasn’t a professional and didn’t have the tools to properly help her. Anne agreed to go, and it was the best experience of her life. She probably wouldn’t have been to heal from those scars without Catalina because she’d never felt comfortable enough around anyone to talk about it.

The only other person she felt a strong connection with was her younger cousin, Katherine, but she was too young to listen to Anne’s relationship troubles. And she had bigger issues she had to face at her young age. She’d lost her mother at the age of 5 and now at 16, she was losing her father.

Katherine was the youngest of 11. There a significant age gap between most of her older siblings and herself. So, she never got to truly bond with them. Even if her closest sister, Mary, was the same age as Anne, Kat and Mary weren’t that close either because the older girl spent a lot of time at school, hoping for a better future.

Anne was Kat’s only blood-relative who seemed to care about her. When her father fell ill, Kat’s older siblings had all moved out by then. It made sense. Most of them were adults by then with lives of their own. Then, there was Mary who was just 20, and had moved across the pond to the State to study. Her siblings did their best to check on their baby sister, but she couldn’t blame them for having busy lives.

Her cousin, however, was furious that her siblings didn’t try harder to take care of Kat. So, she talked to Kat’s father, and got all the paperwork necessary to become Kat’s legal guardian once he passed away. Edmund easily agreed, knowing that he didn’t have many options for Kat. Either ways, Anne had pretty much been the one to take care of his youngest daughter for the past year.

Anne hadn’t really given much thought to becoming Kat’s legal guardian. She dove headfirst in everything she did, but she never regretted signing those papers. Kat was her baby cousin. They’d only met when Anne was 9 and Kat was 5, but she’d loved and cared for that little ever since they met at Kat’s mother’s funeral.

It felt like it was a natural progression for Anne to take on the role as Kat’s legal guardian. But when it finally happened, Anne started to freak out. She was only 20 years old. She had just taken a gap year to travel around Europe and was starting drama school in the fall. She barely considered herself an adult. How was she supposed to take care of a 16-year-old? Granted, Kat was fairly autonomous for a teenager, but Anne still felt the need to be a good parent-like figure.

Her intuition told her to call Catalina for advice. They’d kept in touch after she’d finished tutoring Anne, and they’d talk a bit every year to catch up, but it had been years since they’d last seen each other, much less have a conversation that exceeded ‘what have you been up to’.

Anne was grateful that Catalina was ready with open arms to help her younger friend out. Catalina had a motherly nature to her and succeeded in calming Anne down. “I remember you telling me about Kat, and your relationship. You already seem to have taken the role of a legal guardian before the papers made it official. The only thing that’s changed is that the government recognizes it now.” She told Anne as she rubbed her back.

“It’s normal that you’re feeling nervous, but I’m confident that you’re going to be just fine. Maybe you’ll have a few mishaps, but mistakes are bound to happen. Just make sure to talk about it. You know how important communication is. And remember that you are her cousin, but you’re also her legal guardian now. Sometimes, you’ll need to be more authoritative. It’ll feel weird, but it’s going to be okay,” Catalina said.

Anne thanked her former tutor as Catalina paid for their coffee before leaving the shop. “You know you can always call me, Annie.”

“I know, and I probably will now,” she replied. “What with Kat and all that.”

“Hey,” she called her and put a hand on Anne’s shoulder, “you’ll be alright.”

She nodded and melted into Catalina’s arms. Anne was convinced Catalina’s hugs were a gift sent from heaven. They never failed to make her feel at home. Thankfully for Anne, she would get to hug Catalina more often because they decided to have supper altogether every month. Catalina, Jane, Anne, and Katherine.

The first one they had was at Catalina and Jane’s home. Anne noticed there were still a few boxes left to unpack and Jane quickly tried to block Anne’s view. “You don’t have to be embarrassed about that, honey.” Catalina giggled at Jane’s antics.

“We’ve been here a year and we still have things left to unpack,” Jane told Catalina.

“You’re busy women, I get it.” Anne shrugged.

It was the first time Anne (and Kat) met Jane, but she had heard plenty of the lovely woman from Catalina in the past. Jane and Anne got along just fine, but from the get-go, Jane had this instinct to look after Kat who didn’t mind at all.

Catalina had prepared a delicious meal for them, nicely seasoned chicken with some rice, but she still had to finish roasting some veggies, so Anne helped her out. Meanwhile, Jane sat with Kat and told her about the brownie recipe she was testing out. As they ate, the four women shared various stories relating to what was going on in their lives. Catalina told them about this new kid in her class that she was having trouble with because he refused to speak in Spanish even though that was pretty much the most important rule of her classroom (other than respect). Jane continued with a story about the same boy who paid her a visit in her office for a fake bloody nose, and then she saw him the next day when she worked a shift at the hospital for an actual bloody nose. Kat realized that she knew the kid because he was her classmate’s brother and proceeded to tell them about the two boys’ strange behaviour.

For the first time in a long time, Anne felt at home, with those three other women surrounding her, all laughing at a joke she’d just told. She glanced around the dinner table, observing Catalina and Jane listening carefully to Kat talking animatedly about this stray dog she kept seeing near the schoolyard that she’d nicknamed Wolfie. This felt right, like she should have been doing this much sooner.

Back at the flat, she and Kat shared meals pretty much every night, and they talked, but she couldn’t deny that from time to time, it felt forced. They couldn’t just sit in comfortable silence, because that didn’t exist in their household. Not since they became a household. And some night, Anne wondered how their relationship changed when Kat started living with her. Was it a mistake?

No way.

She loved living with Kat. So, what was the uneasy feeling about? Anne didn’t get to figure it out during dinner because the night was over as quickly as it started. Anne almost wanted to ask to stay a bit longer because she thought this, the group, felt more like home than just her and her Kitkat back at her flat. Kat had moved in with her just a few months ago, and everything was going smoothly, but Anne couldn’t ignore that there was something that didn’t feel quite right.

She originally thought it was because the place was too cramped for two people. Anne had transformed her office into a bedroom for Kat, but she had to admit it was quite a small bedroom. It barely had enough space for a bed, never mind a desk. Kat assured her that it was perfect. She preferred staying in the living room with Anne anyways. Well, when Anne was home.

Anne was a familiar face in the college party scene. Before Kat, Anne would go out with her friends every weekend, but she stopped the moment Kat moved in. Though, her younger cousin urged her to go out from time to time. “I’ll be fine if I’m alone a few Fridays here and there, Annie,” she said with a smile. “It’ll give me some time away from you too,” she teased.

So, Anne felt comfortable going out again. She often bumped into this one German girl, Anna. She was a bartender, and when she wasn’t working, she was partying at the same places Anne was. She was one of the rare people who actually stuck around after discovering that the alluring Anne Boleyn was actually just a regular girl.

“Oh, cut it off, Boleyn,” Anne said loudly, fighting with the music. “Stop being so self-deprecating. You’re an amazing gal. Yeah, people approach you because you have an enchanting aura, but people should also know that there’s so much more to you than just a mystery to unravel.”

“I don’t think you’re talking about me,” Anne said, head resting on the bar. “If I was all that and more, tell me why I’m here getting drunk instead of taking care of my baby cousin.

“First of all, get your head off of that. Who knows how filthy that surface is. Second of all, your ‘baby cousin’ isn’t a baby. She’s nearly 17. Stop talking about it like you’re an alcoholic mother abandoning her newborn daughter. Third of all… if you really want to be with Kat, why don’t you just go home then?” Anna said in a more tender voice.

“Because,” Anne whined. “Because… because it doesn’t feel like home!” She grunted and rested her head in her hands. “I’m trying so damn hard to make Kat happy, and bless Kitkat’s heart, she’s being the absolute best kid anyone could ever ask for. She helps with chores, she goes to school and is doing well, she tells me that I’m going a good job at taking care of her and I should go out to let loose more. It’s like I’m the kid and she’s the parent.”

“She says she’s happy and that she doesn’t need anything else. But I know she deserves more. She deserves a home, but I don’t know how to give her that.” A crestfallen expression appeared on Anne’s face.

“Why don’t you tell her that?” Anna suggested. “Tell her everything you’ve just told me. Maybe you two can figure it out together instead of you kicking yourself for something you probably can’t change alone.”

“I’m drunk. I probably won’t even remember this tomorrow morning,” Anne explained.

She was right.

The next morning, the only thing Anne remembered was that Anna had brought her home and she and Kat tucked her in bed after making her drink a glass of water. With the sunlight hitting her face, Anne squinted and struggled to sit up. She felt terrible, but at least she wasn’t nauseous. She had a hint of a headache, but it was nothing ibuprofen couldn’t remedy.

She would get up soon to do something productive, but for now, Anne wanted just a few more minutes in the comfort of her bed. Kat didn’t seem to care about that because she knocked harshly on Anne’s door just as she started to fall back asleep. “Annie?” She stayed silent hoping the teenager would leave if she thought she was sleeping. To her dismay, Kat just barged in the room. “I know you’re awake, I heard you flop back down on your bed.”

“What is it, Kitkat?” Anne asked, her face buried in her pillow.

“We need to start preparing dinner for tonight.”

Anne’s head shot up, her eyes wide open. “Oh fuck!”

“You forgot, didn’t you,” Kat said. Even though Anne couldn’t see her face, she could hear the smile in her voice.

Anne tried to untangle herself from the mess of her bedsheets to get up as quickly as possible. She had never gotten out of bed and ready to leave her flat as fast as she had that day. And it was all because she forgot she had planned to have dinner at her flat with Catalina, Jane, and Kat.

Anne wasn’t as great of a cook as Catalina was, but she had managed to survive these past few years without ordering too much takeout. And with Kat under her wing now, she had pushed herself to learn more recipes. Kat, on the other hand, had learned to cook young because she and Mary didn’t really like their father’s cooking. So, when she moved in with Anne, she helped out a lot.

In the grocery store, Anne was trying to remember whether they needed to restock their paprika when Kat asked her, “is it true you don’t feel at home with me?” Way to start off a casual conversation on a Saturday morning.

Anne turned to study Kat’s face. “Kat…”

“Anna told me last night that you said you felt like something was wrong, that you were trying, but that it didn’t feel like home. Did I do something wrong?” She asked in a small voice.

“Oh, Kitkat, no of course not. You haven’t done anything wrong,” Anne replied and rushed to hug her younger cousin. “Honestly, I don’t really remember what I told Anna… but I just…” She sighed. “I don’t know. It’s not about you or living with you. I’ve sort of felt like something was off even before all of this. I thought that when you moved in, it would all change. I thought I was just missing the presence of more family. And in some way, I was right because living with you is so much better than living alone!”

“You’re like this ball of sunshine that’s entered my life. And everything is better when you’re around… Yet, I have this feeling that something’s missing, and I can’t place what it is.”

“Do you want to live with Catalina and Jane?” Kat suddenly asked.

“What?”

“Jane stopped by the café I work at last week, and we talked a bit. She offered us to move in with them. She heard that your flat is quite small, and she thinks their house feels too big for just the two of them. She’s talked to Catalina about it, but she doesn’t want to pressure you into anything because she knows how much you love the flat we currently live in,” Kat clarified.

Catalina was right. That flat had a special place in Anne’s heart. Sure, it wasn’t the best flat. At certain times of the year, she could hear her upstairs neighbours’ footsteps. And there was a specific way to turn on the faucet unless they wanted to hear the pipes squeak for hours. It had its flaws, but that place held so many memories. It was the first flat Anne had moved into after leaving her childhood home. Following her gap year, she’d welcomed friends over from various countries she had visited in the past. She’d rehearsed so many lines for auditions in front of the mirror in her bedroom. It was the place where she took Kat under her wing.

So, leaving that flat wasn’t an idea Anne was fond of, but living with Catalina, Jane and Kat? That was something she could get behind. Catalina had never asked her though. She had told Jane that it was because she cared about Anne’s feelings, but what if she was lying? What if Catalina didn’t actually want to live with her? Just like that, Anne’s insecurities got the best of her, and she started to doubt every little thing that had ever happened between her and her former tutor.

The part of her that was hyper self-conscious kept running past scenarios in her head the whole day. Kat noticed that her older cousin seemed a bit out of it, but she attributed it to nerves. She probably wanted to impress Catalina and Jane. But even throughout the dinner, Anne seemed to have a small permanent frown on her face. It wasn’t until Catalina pulled her aside that she realized everyone could tell she wasn’t feeling well.

“Annie, are you okay?”

“Yeah,” she squeaked.

“That’s what you said when I asked you if you understood what difference between ser and estar… Just in case you forgot that painfully long session, you lied,” Catalina retorted, crossing her arms. “Please, tell me what’s wrong.” She knitted her eyebrows, clearly worried about the younger woman.

Anne kept quiet, but Catalina didn’t budge. She stood there in front of Anne who sat on the edge of her bed. Anne may be stubborn, but so was Catalina. She would wait as long as she had to until Anne was ready to talk about what was tormenting her. Anyways, Kat was busy showing Jane her collection of small puppy-plushies in her room. So, they weren’t going to be interrupted anytime soon.

It turns out, Anne was no match when it came to Catalina’s stubbornness. Anne sighed and let her shoulders drop. “I feel like I’m doing this whole thing wrong.”

“With Kat?” Anne nodded. “What did she say?”

“Nothing. She actually thinks she’s done something wrong, but it’s not her. It has to be me. I’m always messing up. I mean just look at my whole life. I dated the first guy who showed interest in me and he turned out to be a jerk, not to mention a massive creep. I’m supposed to good in languages, yet I couldn’t pass that Spanish course for the life of me. And I decided that I was fit to take care of a teenager when I’m barely an adult myself. I make dumb decisions after dumb decisions. I can’t do anything good in life. I’m a fuck up.”

“Anne Boleyn, you stop that,” Catalina said sternly. She crouched down to grab Anne by the shoulders and looked her straight in the eye. “I need you to listen to me carefully. You are _not_ a fuck up. You make mistakes, yes, but so does everyone else on this Earth. That Spanish course? You passed it. So what if you needed some help along the way? That is perfectly fine. Plus, that’s how we met. Don’t tell me you regret meeting now.” She winked, but returned to her serious tone right after.

“Deciding to take care of Kat when nobody else would? It wasn’t an impulsive decision. It may feel like it, but deep down, you know that this was the best thing that could’ve happened to her. You made that decision because you have an instinct to take care of Kat, and you do a damn good job at it. Kat knows it, you know it, we all do,” she told her, never breaking eye contact.

“And don’t even get me started on the whole Henry thing. _He_ took advantage of _you_. You were a literal child. He was nearly a legal adult. How were you supposed to distinguish right from wrong when he’d pretty much been grooming you?” Catalina sat down next to Anne to hold her in her arms. “I thought you were working on this in therapy.”

“I stopped going a while back,” Anne admitted. “I’ve been so busy trying to take care of Kat and juggling that along with school and work. There are only so many hours in a day, and I have to start preparing for my final third-year showcase. It’s still a year away, but you know how many opportunities I could get from that. You can never start practicing too early.”

“Oh, Annie,” Catalina cooed and stroked her hair. Anne hadn’t realized she had been crying until she felt the dampened fabric of Catalina’s shirt against her cheek. She let Anne cry against her, recalling a memory of Jane and her being in a similar position just a few years ago.

Catalina pulled away for a moment and said, “I have something to propose to you, but I don’t want to force you to do anything you do want to.” Seeing Anne being attentive and open, she continued, “Jane and I have been talking ever since we had dinner last month. We’ve known each other for years now, the two of us. I haven’t known Kat for all that long, but I’d like to think that the four of us get along quite well. Jane, especially, has taken a liking to Kat. Sometimes, I think she sees Kat as her daughter even though she’s just a few years younger.” Both chuckled at that.

“And I have noticed how relaxed you were during that first dinner, which I think is vastly different from tonight or even when I bump into you in the streets. Now, that you’ve told me how you’ve been feeling. Everything kind of makes more sense. I’ve been meaning to ask you this, but never found the right moment to do so. If I don’t ask now, I feel like I might regret it down the road. So, again, you don’t have to say yes, or even give me a solid response right now, but would you consider moving in with us? Both you and Kat?”

“I think it could really help you feel less stress—” Anne wrapped her arms tightly around Catalina’s body.

“I’d love that,” Anne breathed out.

Catalina grinned and repositioned herself to be more comfortable. “I need you to do something for me though if you’re going to live with us.” Anne braced herself for the request that was coming her way. “Please, go back to therapy.”

“I will,” Anna promised with a smile.

“Guess what?” Catalina asked a moment later. “Someone called me Camilla today.”

Anne laughed, and in that moment, she knew that Catalina was right all along. Everything would be okay.


	3. katherine howard

Sometimes, Kat questioned whether or not reincarnations existed. And if so, what had she done in her previous life to deserve this new one? There were people who had it worse, but at the ripe age of 18, she would say that she had lived through a good number of tragedies.

She was born the youngest of 11 children. Normally, one would expect the baby to be well… babied by their whole family. That wasn’t the case for Katherine Howard. It wasn’t like her parents neglected her, but it wasn’t easy to take care of so many children, especially when one of the parents was sick.

Kat didn’t have many memories of her mother. She didn’t like to think about her though because when she did, all that ever came up were images of hospital beds and the smell of a sterile hospital room. She had a hard time remembering a time where her mother wasn’t sick. She probably had been at some point after Kat’s birth, but Kat wouldn’t remember any of that because by the time she was 5 years old, her mother had passed away. She never knew what illness her mother suffered from since she was so young back then, but she never bothered finding out. Again, she didn’t like to think about it.

She could barely call the woman her mother. Having lost her at such a young age, any kind of attachment Kat may have developed when she was a toddler had disappeared in a few years as she grew up. To her, Joyce Culpeper was just the woman who gave birth to her. Kat wasn’t reproachful of her, but she didn’t miss her either. If she had to describe her feelings towards her mother, she would simply say Switzerland.

Her father often told her that she took after Joyce, especially when he caught books way too advanced for her young age. She never knew if he was telling her the truth or if he just said that out of guilt that his youngest daughter never got to truly get to know her mother. Kat found that ironic because it wasn’t like she got to know her father either.

She understood that he was working hard to put food on the table and keep a roof over their head, which she was grateful for. But she wasn’t stupid. Most of her siblings were adults by the time she was born and were out of the house. So, there were fewer mouths to feed. There was Mary who was only older than her by 4 years, but everyone else was 10 years her senior. George, the third youngest, had moved out once he was 19. And just like the rest of her siblings, he never looked back.

It wasn’t like she could fault her father for going out and trying to find love again. She could empathize with his desire to find a companion. Though, that meant she and Mary pretty much had to take care of themselves from a young age. She and Mary would split the house chores. Mary would do the groceries, Kat would do the laundry, and they would both cook and do the dishes together.

The girls also learned how to manage their money before the rest of their peers had to. And once Kat was of age, she got a job as a barista at some local café. All of this early maturing proved to be quite useful because their father would face the same fate as their mother a little over a decade after her.

Kat recognized that she was sad when Edmund passed, but she also knew that she was more worried during the year before his death. She was worried about what would happen to her. She was doing a good job at taking care of herself, but she was still a child. Mary had moved out 2 years ago because she got a scholarship to study in the States, so she was fine. But Kat still needed a legal guardian.

One of her older siblings could technically take on that role, but it wasn’t like any of them would by choice. There were a lot of them, but with such a significant age gap between them, Kat never bonded with them. She rarely ever saw them as a child because they were adults and had lives of their own. So, she didn’t fault them for not wanting to take care of a teenager when they already had children of their own to take care of.

But she wouldn’t lie and say that she wasn’t scared. She was absolutely terrified of what would happen to her once her father passed away. Her current step-mother wasn’t very fond of the idea of raising a teenager by herself, but she would if that was what Kat wanted. Kat’s step-grandmother was another option, but Kat was the one who didn’t feel comfortable living with a woman she barely knew. She was so wrapped up in choosing between the lesser of two evils, it never even crossed her mind that her cousin would be the one to volunteer herself to become her legal guardian.

She had only heard about her cousin, Anne, for the first five years of her life. When they finally met at Kat’s mother’s funeral, they got along right away. Anne lived in the next town, but she would often take the tube to visit Kat. And when she took a gap year to travel, she brought back a ton of souvenirs for her little cousin. It was undeniable that the pair were close. Their relationship could never compare to that of Kat’s with her siblings, except maybe Mary.

She never imagined Anne becoming her legal guardian though because legally, she was an adult at 20 years old, but mentally? There was still some maturing to do. Anne was a child at heart. It was one of the reasons she and Kat got along so well. When she was with her cousin, she forgot all about her troubles at home. She could be carefree and act like any other kid, and later teenager. Kat was aware that people around her liked to describe her as a cheerful and bubbly person, but sometimes, she questioned whether that would’ve still been the case had Anne not been in her life.

Thinking about her past, even unrelated to her parents, was something that mostly brought on sadness upon Kat. So, she didn’t dwell on that for long, but when she did, she thought about how she lonely despite having an abundance of siblings who were supposed to be there for her and care for her. The few happy memories she had of her childhood were of the times Anne’s family would come visit or when Edmund would drop Kat and Mary off at the Boleyn’s for a week during the summer holidays.

So, when Anne sat her down in the hallway of the hospital while her father was being seen by his doctor, and asked her if she would be okay with Anne becoming her legal guardian, Kat was shocked, but ecstatic. Anne and Kat had been spending more time together in the past year since the older cousin had moved into a flat in London after her gap year full of adventures. Mary had moved to America around the same time Anne moved to London, so Anne naturally started to act like Kat’s big sister.

After hanging out at her place, Anne would accompany her younger cousin to her bus stop and made Kat texted her once she got home to make sure she was safe. Anne was there to listen to Kat rant about every single boy who was bothering her at school. And she was the one who made sure that each of those boys understood that they had messed with the wrong family.

First, there was Henry Mannox, the boy who tried to date Kat when she was only 13 and he was way too old for her. Anne paid him a ‘special visit’ that resulted in him walking with a limp for a short while after. Then, there was Francis Dereham who was Kat’s first and only boyfriend who, on paper, didn’t seem that bad. But then Anne found out that he was the same age as her while Kat was still 15, and he was pressuring her into taking things to the next level. Reminded of her own experience, Anne refused to let anyone hurt and take advantage of Kat the way she had been during her own teenage years. With the help of a new German friend she’d made, Anne made Dereham understand that the next time he… well, let’s just say that he’d hoped there wouldn’t be a ‘next time’. There were also other boys who tried to get Kat’s attention, but once Anne came in the picture, they always disappeared.

All that to say that to Kat, the closest familial relationship she ever had was with Anne. Her beliefs were confirmed when she stood in a sea of family at her father’s funeral months later, and felt no connection with everyone else in the room, save Anne. Even she and Mary had grown distant over the past year of the older girl studying abroad.

To have Anne become her legal guardian felt right. Living with her felt right, despite the strange tension that started to grow in the months following her moving in.

Kat was aware of the fact that Anne used to go to therapy, but she thought her older cousin had stopped going because she no longer needed it. She didn’t know it was because her schedule was overwhelming her. She probably wouldn’t even have figured it out if she hadn’t shared her worried about Anne with Jane.

It was a few weeks after their first meeting at Catalina and Jane’s house. She was bored out of her mind at the café on a slow afternoon when she heard the bell chime, announcing the arrival of a new customer. Her eyes found a familiar blonde smiling at her.

“Hey there, Katherine,” Jane said as she made her way to the till.

“Jane, hi!” Kat started to grin. There was something about the older woman’s presence that just warmed her heart. She couldn’t help but smile whenever she saw her.

“I remembered you telling me that you hated Tuesday shifts because you barely have any customers, and I don’t have anything planned today. So, I figured I could come keep you company,” she explained. Jane proceeded to order a latte and with just a bit of convincing, Kat’s manager allowed her to chat with her new friend while there were no other customers.

They started to catch up on what they’d been up to since the last time they saw each other. Jane told Kat about her hectic work life alternating between half of the week at the hospital and the other half at the school she and Catalina worked at. Kat told her about how she was doing at school and adjusting to her new life with Anne.

“How is she, by the way?” Jane tried to make it come off as a casual question, but Kat could tell there was a bit more weight to her question than she was letting on.

“Anne’s… Honestly, I’m not really sure,” she admitted, glancing at her glossy reflection on the metal counter. “She does seem more tired than she used to be. I figured it could’ve been because of school, but…” She didn’t finish the rest of that sentence. She couldn’t be sure of when Anne’s mood started changing, but she knew that things were different before she moved in.

“Sweetheart, it’s not because you did something,” Jane tried to reassure her as she rested her hands on top of Kat’s. “Although, I do think that Annie’s putting more pressure on herself because as mature and independent as you are for your age, you are still her baby cousin in her eyes. She’ll always want to take care of you and she probably feels the need to be perfect for you. Plus, she’s just started drama school right? It’s a lot of big changes.”

“One of those changes is me,” Kat countered as her eyebrows knitted together.

Jane sighed, understanding where Kat was coming from, but also not knowing how to prevent the teenager from blaming herself for something she had no control over. “Look, I have this proposition for both of you, but Lina is still reluctant about this because she doesn’t want either of you to feel pressured to say yes. So, this is all very hypothetical, but what do you think about moving in with Lina and I? You wouldn’t necessarily be paying rent, but you’d be contributing in different ways like chores, running errands, or paying for gas. We’ve noticed that Anne’s been a bit tenser lately and we’re hoping this could help?”

“Anne doesn’t know about this?”

“No, and I really would’ve preferred Lina being the one to bring this up to her first, but maybe you could try and see if Anne would even be open to the idea? And of course, that’s if you’re also interested.” Kat hummed in apprehension when Jane’s phone buzzed. “Looks like I have to leave. Lina’s forgot to buy almond milk this morning. Just think about what I said, yeah? And let me know whenever you’ve made up your mind? Take all the time you need.”

“Alright, see you soon.” Kat hugged Jane goodbye. “Oh, and Jane,” she called her as the nurse started to walk out. She whipped her head back around. “Thank you. For everything.”

“Of course, darling. See you.”

After Jane left, Kat kept replaying scenes in her head of things that’d happened at the flat with Anne. Even though Jane assured her that it wasn’t something she’d done, she couldn’t help but feel like it was her fault that her cousin was feeling a bit distraught. Had she overstepped somehow? Was she too comfortable at the flat? Sure, it was supposed to be her new home, but it remained Anne’s home first. Was she not helping out enough? She helped Anne out with chores and sometimes even cooked meals here and there for both of them, but she didn’t for anything, except for snacks she’d by from vending machines on her way back from school. She could pay rent though. She earned enough from the café to pay a small amount every month, and the small amount of money she’d inherited from her father that she could take out of her savings.

When she brought it up to Anne though, she straight up refused to even let Kat utter the end of her sentence. “I’m not going to make you pay rent,” she told her as if it was the most ridiculous idea she’d ever heard. “I’m your big cousin, not your landlord, Kat.” They started arguing because Kat claimed that this was unfair, but Anne quickly shut her down. “We can sit here for hours, but I’m not changing my mind, Kitkat. I’m not letting you pay rent. I was living here on my own before and I was fully capable of paying for everything myself. You’re already planning to pay for college on your own, so you need to save up.”

“I do have money saved up! I have my inheritance from my father and my mother,” Kat replied with a huff.

“That’s not going to be enough.” Anne shook her head. The Howards weren’t exactly rich to begin with. Add onto that the fact that there several children that the inheritance would be split between. It didn’t leave Kat with much, even if in the end, she did get a bigger share, at the insistence of her older siblings claiming that she needed it more than they did.

“I have money saved up from the café.”

“That you need to continue saving, yeah.”

Kat groaned and wanted to throw a pillow at Anne for being so stubborn. It must’ve been a Howard thing. Regardless, Kat wasn’t giving up either. And it took another half hour for Anne to agree to let Kat pay for half of the groceries. “Only when you come with me,” she added as a condition. Anne went grocery shopping every Sunday morning and it either coincided with Kat’s work shift or her rare sleep-in days. Kat wanted to protest again, but relented. This was the closes she’d get to a fair arrangement.

Still, things didn’t change much. There was still this weird atmosphere around them, which made Kat want to just ask Anne what was going on, but she didn’t have the courage to do it. When her father was still alive and brought home women who’d later become her step-mother, she’d asked the first one why she was upset one day. In response, she was berated for being rude for claiming that she ‘looked tired’ which was the equivalent of looking ugly according to the woman. She was only scolded that one time, but it was enough for her to never do it again.

Ever since then, Kat always held back from prying into other people’s businesses. When Anne realized this though, she assured her that she was not being nosy at all. “You’re being empathetic and caring. That’s a good thing,” she said to a sniffling 7-year-old Kat. The Howards were visiting the Boleyns who had once again returned to their Kent home from France for the summer. Kat bit her tongue before she could ask Anne why she was grumpy when she woke up. But the raven-haired girl caught her stopping herself. So, she asked her what was wrong. When Kat refused to talk, it started a small argument between the two girls, ending with the younger one bursting into tears. It took some time, but Anne was able to coax the answer out of Kat.

Even though she tried to unlearn this habit of hers with the help of Anne, Kat hadn’t completely succeeded yet. Proof of this was manifesting now as she just observed Anne around their flat, pretending that nothing was wrong, that she wasn’t constantly overthinking her words and actions.

It all ended when Catalina talked to Anne about moving in with them. That night, when Jane and Catalina left after dinner, Anne and Kat finally had an honest conversation about what had been going on for the past year, how they’d been feeling, and what they needed to change going forward. They both agreed to go to therapy, and to stop keeping secrets from one another. It was a slow process, but Kat eventually opened up to Anne again, like when they were children. And she started to open up to Catalina and Jane as well.

In the beginning, Kat didn’t think much of the new move. She was busy with college applications and just went through the motions back home. It wasn’t until everything calmed down at school that she realized that the idea of having new housemates was vastly different from actually living with Catalina and Jane. Kat wasn’t shy when it came to being affectionate, but that only applied to people she was close to. And as much as she liked being around Jane, she didn’t expect the older woman to cuddle with her while she was reading in the living room.

“Janey, you should probably lay off a bit. I don’t think Katherine’s very comfortable,” Catalina remarked with a small smile, having noticed how awkward Kat had been with Jane so close to her.

“Oh, I’m so sorry.” Jane immediately sat up and shifted a bit further. “I shouldn’t have assumed.”

“I’m just…not used to having someone mother me,” she admitted, almost surprising herself.

Wanting to have a motherly figure was always more of a fleeting thought rather than a conscious desire she had. Scratch that, any parental figure at all would have satisfied her. Having been pretty much forced into growing up faster than the other kids her age, Kat sort of just accepted everything that happened to her. Her whole life consisted of adjusting and adapting, on her own (and sometimes with the help of Mary). Even as Anne took her under her wing, she remained her older cousin. She didn’t become some version of a mother figure. With Jane and Catalina, things were different.

“Well, I’m not quite old enough to be your mother,” Jane replied, but her voice carried a lighthearted tone. “But I guess I do kind of baby you, don’t I?”

“I don’t really mind.” Kat shrugged, feeling shy about her confession. “I just need some time to get used to it.”

So, they took things slow. Jane and Catalina would ask for Kat’s permission before doing things like kissing her forehead before going to work, snuggling with her in the living room, kissing her cheek or forehead before heading to bed, hugging her when they felt proud of her, etc. Eventually, Kat told them that they didn’t need to ask because it felt redundant, but they still did it from time to time out of respect, especially when Kat had nightmares.

She didn’t have them often. And most of the time, they faded away mere moments after she awoke, leaving her alone with feelings of anxiety and fear. They jolted Kat awake and had her breathing heavily as she sat up in her darkened room. Most nights, all she had to do was look out the window beside her bed and steady herself as she gazed at the moon (or the stars if the sky was clear) while slowly breathing in and out.

Then, there were nights where Kat woke up with a scream that turned into tears. She would try to muffle the noise she made, but there was no way she could hide her sobs as she held sat with her knees to her chest. Those were the nights where the images of her nightmares were still fresh in her mind when she woke up. It was usually the same nightmare, like Kat’s personal horror movie playing on a loop.

“Kat?” She could barely hear Jane call from the other side of her bedroom door one night. Kat didn’t respond. She thought that if she kept quiet, the older woman would simply leave. She probably would’ve if a sob didn’t manage to escape Kat’s mouth. The teenager had no idea what she looked like, but she assumed she must’ve had the most frantic look on her face as Jane rushed to her side after slowly letting herself in. “Oh, sweetheart.”

Kat immediately burst into tears again and just Jane hold her as she whispered reassuring words, trying to soothe her. She waited until Kat stopped wheezing to ask, “what happened?”

“Nightmare,” Kat croaked.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

She did. But she didn’t know how. Where should she start?

The walls of the hospital were pastel mint green. The neon lights above nearly blinded her as she walked forward, following the crisscross pattern of brown tiles between white tiles. Everyone seemed to tower her. She felt like an ant walking around the halls. She could hear the chattering around her, but she couldn’t tell what they were saying. The only words she could decipher were ‘gone’ and ‘goodbye’.

Even then, the echoing might as well have been white noise because the way her tightness in her chest had all of her attention. Kat wasn’t heading anywhere in particular, or at least nothing was indicating her where to go. All she knew was that she had to keep walking, keep moving forward, but each step she took, the harder it became for her to continue. It was like there was a ball and chain attached to her ankles, and with each step, the ball somehow got heavier and heavier. Yet, she had this urge to keep going, no matter how hard it was to breathe, how hard it was to move.

She tried to cry for help, and despite all the tall people surrounding her, nobody came to her. They didn’t even bat an eye. They couldn’t hear her.

At some point, her breathing became so shallow, she was sure she would stop breathing altogether. Her legs were also pretty much stuck in place by then. And it was always around that part of the nightmare that Kat would wake up, sweating.

When she lived with her father, he was usually out cold and wouldn’t hear her wake up. Mary would occasionally lie next to her when they were younger, but as they got older, Kat figured she had to deal with her nightmares alone. Moving in with Anne taught her that no matter how old she got, she never had to deal with those alone. Anne never hesitated to groggily walk in her bedroom, and tuck Kat back in before snuggling with her. But once they moved in with Catalina and Jane, she didn’t expect things to change.

After all, Anne was still with her, and she was still the one who usually came to comfort her. Although, there was this one time Anne had to go away for a few days to visit a friend, and Kat had her recurring nightmare on the first night she was away. That was the first time Jane comforted her.

Kat didn’t tell her about the details of her nightmare. She didn’t feel ready yet. Jane accepted that and remained by her side. “Do you want me to stay?” She asked because she knew Anne usually did, but the raven-haired woman was out of town that night. Kat wanted to say yes. She wanted nothing more, but she couldn’t voice it out loud. So, she stayed silent, expecting Jane to take that as a ‘no’. Still, she waited for an actual answer. “If you want me to go, I will, but if you want me to stay, I’m here.”

Kat simply nodded with a small smile. Jane almost didn’t hear the whispered ‘stay’ that left Kat’s lips, but she felt her hand being tugged, and she shifted to make herself comfortable.

That wasn’t the last time Jane comforted Kat after a nightmare, even after Anne had come back home. It started out as Jane telling Anne that she could go back to bed and rest for her show tomorrow, but then it became like an agreement of sort that they would take turns helping Kat fall back asleep.

Jane would still ask Kat if it was okay that she was the one there instead of Anne. (The answer would always be yes.) After a while, Jane and Catalina sort of just dropped the habit of checking in with Kat until one day Jane found herself calling Kat ‘Kitten’ by accident. She had never used that nickname with her before. She’d started calling her Kat like Catalina did a few months into moving in, but ‘Kitten’ came up out of nowhere while they were getting ready to go watch a school production Anne was starring in.

“Lina, have you seen my denim jacket?” Kat had been looking on all three floors of the house for that damn jacket and it was nowhere in sight. She had coordinated her whole outfit to match it and they were running out of time. They needed to leave soon if they didn’t want to miss Anne’s show.

“I think saw Jane hang it out on the clothesline the other day,” she told her as she wiped off the little bit of excess lipstick to clean off the corners of her mouth. Like a superhero, Jane arrived at the bottom of the stairs with said jacket in her hands.

“Almost forgot to bring this to you,” said Jane, a little out of breath from running down the stairs.

“Thank you!” Kat squealed and quickly put it on so she could go back to her room to fetch her sneakers.

“No problem, Kitten.” From the moment it slipped out of her mouth, all three stilled, taken aback by the new pet name she’d called her. “Is that alright?”

“Yeah, it’s perfect.” Kat grinned and returned to her previous quest of finding her sneakers.

It was wild to think back about how much Kat’s life had changed over the last two years and a half. She’d gone from fearing what would happen to her once her ill father passed to living with three of the most wonderful women she’d ever met. Little did she know, there would be two new additions to their household very soon, but she would miss meeting one of them later that night.

**Author's Note:**

> come yell about six with me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/hauntingfletch) or [tumblr](https://allyouwannaparr.tumblr.com/)


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